Slogan Skeptic Gifts

MJX Corporation: Committed to Excellence and Whatnot.

'I can't put my finger on it, but something doesn't seem right.'

"'Love makes a Subaru a Subaru' my eye!"

"Finally, a succinct corporate mission statement."

"I remember when walls weren't so bossy."

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

'I'm part of the decision-making process... I'm the 'No' part.'

Alternative Medicine

"God works in mysterious ways."

'A 'D' in physics and biology, an 'A' in reading aloud. What will ever become of this kid?'

"If we evolved from stupid people, why are there stupid people still around?"

'Typical man...too stubborn to stop and ask for directions.'

First clue that the latest medical breakthrough isn't quite there yet - 'Don't worry, I had the same thing...'

'My philosophy has always been, sell advice, don't follow it.'

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

'I was born with math immunity, so I'm special. I know that.'

"What I like about intelligent design is that it explains everything will proving nothing."

"If they de-regulate this place, we wouldn't have to do all those boring scientific tests."

"I totally meant to do that."

'You can do whatever you want, Herb, but I sure wouldn't take advice from a bowl of alphabet soup!'

"Solar flares may be a contributing factor or perhaps it's a negative vibe sensitivity...."

"We've concluded that an alarming percentage of the population are experiencing involuntary eye-rolling at the word 'inclusion'."

"If I hear the word ‘mindfulness’ one more time, I swear I’m gonna lose it."

GOP presidental candidates on science!: 'Billions for astrollogers! Zero for astronomers!' s

"Recent studies now show that people who use the aphorism ‘whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’ have compromised immune systems."

Documentation Please

"Dad just told me a weird stork story. He must be a creationist."

'It's just a conspiracy by scientists to get funding.'

"OK, so you've told us what God thinks... but now I'd like to know what YOU think!"

Science deniers Soc.

'In compliance with Federal full-disclosure laws, I'm required to tell you that I'm really not all that sure about some of this stuff.'

"The drug has, however, proved more effective than traditional psychoanalysis."

RFK Jr Anti-Vax

Priest to congregation, "I'm no different to you just because I wear a dog collar."

"I take it the tortoise wasn't available."