Sleep Sound Analyst T-Shirts

"I wore a wire last night to prove you really snore!"

"Clearly the patient's experiencing difficulty attaining the deep, final level of restful sleep."

A man's brain is in a glass on his bed stand next to his dentures.

'I'm sleepy all the time.'

"I'm getting paid to assist sleep research..."

“I get that the sounds help you sleep, but I don’t like the way he stares.”

'It's the most amazing case of rapid eye movement I've ever seen.'

'We have separate bedrooms because I snore and because I can't stand the sight of her.'

The Dangers of Counting Sheep

"I set up the sensors. He sees you when you're sleeping."

'My theory is he's faking sleep in order to get the $50 for the study.'

'A cure for insomnia is a good night's sleep.'

'Six months ought to be enough sleep for anyone.'

'Was it the non-flying dream again?'

All-Night Diner

Department of Dream Studies

'Sorry to disappoint you, but being a self-confessed 'lazy bastard'...'

'Gee! I liked Muazk better than this laugh track!'

"Will you PLEEEEASE stop grinding your teeth!"

Changing the dream

Sleep-Eez Bedding

"It looks like another productive night of sleep and exercise. My smart watch logged seven hours of sleep and over 1,500 steps from sleep walking."

"Baldo, why is this music so loud?"

'We lose three hours on this trip. Suppose we'll suffer from wagon lag?'

"Here's the plan. I use white noise to cover your snoring and you use earplugs to cover the white noise."

"Am I doing something wrong? He won't even consider hibernating."

"Crawford's hard at work, I see!"

'My fitness tracker only logged three hours of sleep last night, but so far today I'm at five hours of day dreaming.'

"Instead of roaming around in the dark, bumping into things, I stay in the cave all night with my eyes closed."

"No, son, I don't know what decisions will be made about your social security. Good night."

'Honey you're roaring.'