Sleeping Sound Specialist T-Shirts

"Here's the plan. I use white noise to cover your snoring and you use earplugs to cover the white noise."

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

"Clearly the patient's experiencing difficulty attaining the deep, final level of restful sleep."

'You know what they say Mum: The early bird catches the worm! So I'm sleeping in...'

'If you can't sleep...imagine you're at work.'

"No doctor, my husband is not sleep-walking again. He is sleep-jumping!"

'zzz sleep.'

Center For Sleep Deprivation

Even though I'm on the do-not-call-list telemarketers manage to ruin my hibernation again.

"I'm getting paid to assist sleep research..."

"I'm sleeping in today. I got in late from last night's orgy."

'Didn't I tell you to take up some hobby other than opera?'

"I slept funny!"

'I want you to try an alternate cure for your insomnia-start watching daytime television.'

“I get that the sounds help you sleep, but I don’t like the way he stares.”

'These hibernation pills ought to do the trick.'

'We have separate bedrooms because I snore and because I can't stand the sight of her.'

"I wore a wire last night to prove you really snore!"

The Dangers of Counting Sheep

"I set up the sensors. He sees you when you're sleeping."

'I'm being tested for sleep apnoea this winter: Better go, see you in spring...'

'How can you sleep at night?'

'A cure for insomnia is a good night's sleep.'

Sleep Disorder Research.

'We're making progress on my insomnia. My foot went to sleep last night.'

'What did you say? You suggested me to COUNT sheep to fall asleep? I thought you told me to EAT sheep...'

Insomniacs Anonymous - No Snoring

Man trying to get to sleep by counting cloned sheep.

'The teddy bear and blankie are the only sleep aids the doctor had that aren't addictive.'

"I won't be in the office today, my apathy is acting up again."