Sleep Joke Aficionado Pillows

"They were great snorers."

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

"I'm down to only one nap a day. From 8 am t0 8 pm."

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

Do not disturb...

Downside of a memory foam mattress.

Hypnotoon

This is our 36th nap today - I can't read you a bedtime story EVERY time.

'It's not Spring yet! Go back to sleep!'

Snooze Alarm for Mole.

"An alarm clock?! Wow... What have I done to make you hate me so much, Louise?"

'What's in going to be, a nip or a nap.'

The downside of the cupcake bed.

It's called "taking a nap," Lance, and no, I don't want to see any Rorschach inkblots.

'How can I get mad at him for sleeping on the job? It was me who told him naps were good for your health.'

"He snores from October to May!"

'We'll take it!'

'What gave him this idea?'

'Marsha, are we going to let a little rough sea spoil our night on the boat? Go back to sleep.'

"I'd like to leave a wake up call for, . ... OHH ..., April."

'Wake up! You're kissing the sheet again...'

'No spring cleaning for me: I get a cleaner to come over in winter while we're asleep...'

'Take it easy, Mom, Dad promised to mow the lawn as soon as he wakes up.'

"My doctor sad I need to concentrate on a monotone to get to sleep. Tell me about your day."

'It's your turn, dear.'

'Of course I'm confused, I keep dreaming I'm an insomniac.'

'The only game my Dad knows is playing possum.'

With some regularity, loony old Uncle Mort rants about his political theories and blatherings. Today: His long-winded theory about the debt-ceiling negotiations. Feel free to nod off … It's the escalation of a religious war in this country. I'm listening, sort of. Those of us who believe in the role of government believe that mankind can improve our lot through innovation, investment, science. But those who oppose government essentially believe that our fate lies with God. Wake up, I'm pontifica

"Sleep mode."

"If you must paw something, why don't you hit the snooze button?"

"What do you mean the company's been relocated and the building demolished...?! That must have been some nap!"

'It's the most amazing case of rapid eye movement I've ever seen.'

"Would you please turn that off and hibernate."

Every falls asleep.

Bear hibernating with seasonal alarm-clock next to bed.