Sleep-deprived Jokester Pillows

'It's your turn, dear.'

"And the important thing is to make sure you wake them up EVERY HOUR during the night."

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

Hypnotoon

'I didn't get the Owners Manual. I thought you got the Owners Manual.'

The downside of the cupcake bed.

"Look, if it wasn’t me and it wasn’t you, who was doing all the snoring?!"

'Hey,mom-have you seen my pet frog?'

"If we were really best friends, you would be fetching my slippers once in awhile."

"What time should we wake him for breakfast?"

'It's these sleeper terrorists, doctor. They're keeping me awake at night.'

'Peel is sleeping badly.' - 'He seems very bright.' - 'Yes.' - 'Bright babies often sleep badly.' - 'Waaaaah!' - 'I want a thick baby.' - 'Zzzzzzz'

"Oh Oh . . . Looks like our five o'clock wake up call is here!"

"How's the insomnia?"

Too-Humble Pie.

Things my cat says at 3 am

Your fingers' worst nightmares

'Mom, did you know that if you turn the clock upside down, '4:45' spells 'Shh?''

Freezing Penguins

'I've got to do something about my insomnia. I didn't sleep a wink at work today.'

"Just go already!" "One could scarcely desire more delightful conditions for a nocturnal ramble..."

"I had a bad dream that you were getting rest."

"...I'd say your health was way below the poverty line!"

'I'm going to hibernate in another cave. Last year your snoring kept me up all winter.'

"A child is like coffee. It's easy to make, but then won't let you sleep."

'I'll call you back. I'm sleepwalking.'

'I told you not to drink coffee before hibernating!'

"I can't remember how to fall asleep. What do you have for insomnesia?"

"Your snoring is really getting out of control."

"They were great snorers."

'Let's play house. You can be my ex-husband.'