Sleep Devotee Gifts

"Hibernating! That's all you think of"

Sleep. The magazine for people who are asleep.

Brain Break

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

"I think I need an extra pillow."

Wordplay: Hibernation.

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

A breakthrough in the morning meeting

"I'm down to only one nap a day. From 8 am t0 8 pm."

Broken Alarm Clock.

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

Contented man and cat sleeping

'I'm a perfect little angel while I'm asleep. It's being awake that causes me trouble.'

Do not disturb...

'Don't take this the wrong way, Honey, but not only have I decided to hibernate this year, but I want to hibernate in the spare room...'

'I hate counting sheep. I get enough math at school.'

'Great! The world ended and I slept right through it!'

"Let's go to sleep so that when we wake up today will be tomorrow."

Baby zipping himself up then going to sleep

"You were snoring."

'It's not Spring yet! Go back to sleep!'

"I only drink decaf, otherwise I'm awake up to four hours a day."

"I like to come prepared for meetings."

"What's with your hair?"

Snooze Alarm for Mole.

'It's a soothing sounds machine. Spring Rain, Summer Breeze, and Fall School Bus.'

The next step in executive efficiency - Microsoft PowerNap.

There's a VERY SIMPLE EXPLANATION. I snore like an alarm clock and my wife mistook my nose for the snooze button.

'Was it the non-flying dream again?'