Sleep Deprivation Champions Pillows

"Sleeping through the night is for losers."

Cry babies.

"Time for bed, guys."

"I'm so good at this!"

"And remember, it's important to wake them up at hourly intervals."

"No doctor, my husband is not sleep-walking again. He is sleep-jumping!"

"The early bird may get the worm, but the late bird gets delicious table scraps."

Man has a dream about a clumsy sheep.

'What he lacks in intelligence he makes up for in stupidity.'

Aging Sign # 23: you're dehydrated and yet up peeing all night.

Number of times your kids will wake in the night/Amount you have to do tomorrow

"Oh, I'm really sorry to hear that you're having trouble getting out of bed in the morning; you know we do have counsellors in the building if you feel you need support with that."

"I'll get you a drink of water, but next time, call Dad, not room service."

'Your 'power nap' is somewhat undermined by Mr Cuddles.'

"I have a problem with resisting arrest."

"How many times have I told you not to watch the news before bed?"

"I stay awake all night worrying about my insomnia, doctor!"

Humpty Dumpty using Egg timer as an Alarm clock.

Toddler in the bed: a journey

"Wake up Mrs. Jones. You're sleep shopping again."

"I kept tossing and turning all winter!"

"He doesn't sleep, what can we possibly do?"

Things my cat says at 3 am

"Just go already!" "One could scarcely desire more delightful conditions for a nocturnal ramble..."

'Sixty eight seconds. Pretty weak, Dad.'

On the phone in bed.

'How's your insomnia?' - 'Terrible, I can't even sleep when it's time to get up.'

"Listen, son...school is important and I expect...no I demand that you try your best. This family believes in the value of education, hard work, career success...and a good night's sleep."

'You really tossed and turned last night.'

Just a sec...