Skeptical Carnivore Gifts

Are we what we eat and what do we actually eat?

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

I Heart Dinosaurs Chef

Gazelle Pizza#:'You guys aren't interested in pizza are you?'

A butcher and his apprentice.

"Namasteak"

'White meat or dark?'

'What?! Not even one of you wants to see how they're made?'

'Health Benefits of a Vegan Diet... How the heck did this get here?'

Cooked rare.

"For the health-conscious, we suggest you chase your own zebra."

'I dunno. Maybe we need a new slogan.'

"Hurry, dear, it's the Brutal Gourmet."

"So who gets the rib eye and who gets the salad?"

Caveman restaurant: Oogs Pieces of cooked meet: Over one Dozen Served.

Too rare perhaps?

'Dreamy! Now how many pounds of beef can you put on one bun?'

"I don't mind being butchered. But I can't stand the thought of my legs going in one box, my breast in another, my wings in another. . ."

"We're wolves, Jessica. We eat veal."

'I'm amazed they had ANY meat in them.'

"Check this out. If you pace back and forth, it hypnotizes them and they give you a steak."

'Eat my vegetables? - I thought we were supposed to be predators!'

We'll have whatever they are

'Not at all, Mr. Porker, we already have several pigs working in our company cafeteria.'

The food was nice...but something was missing.

'Eat my vegetables? - I thought we were supposed to be predators!'

"Sorry sir, it appears that we're out of chicken fingers."

100% organic pork sausages

'Oh ya! I didn't tell you guys. I'm a vegetarian now.'

"Two steaks, cruelly raised and brutally slaughtered. Enjoy!"

"The abattoir hasn't any butchers so you'll have to help yourself a bit more than usual."

"Forget cholesterol. We eat meat, and that's that."

'A person has to eat. Right, Judge?'