Skateboard Skeptic Pillows

"It's a self-driving skateboard."

'How can we believe anything when we can disprove everything?'

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

Support Group for high heels abandoned during the pandemic

'Typical man...too stubborn to stop and ask for directions.'

Skate Bored

'OK, now you've seen it...'

'I'd kill for concrete.'

"You're pathetic."

Descartes's Demon

"The increase in our budget has allowed you the luxury of a company vehicle. Enjoy."

"She's not the perfect wife, but at least she's not always buying shoes."

Snakeboarding.

Let's do it.'

'Don't believe everything you read.'

"On what planet do you imagine this would be funny?"

"IDEOMOTOREFFECT. See! I told you."

Ponzi Schemes Inc

"I've estimated that I've given you over $100,000 in tech-support over the years. Since you're my dad, I'll give you a discount. I'll take a skateboard."

'Wow, thanks for finding my skateboard, daddy!'

Skateboarder discovers his local 'Skate Park' is occupied by parked flatfish.

"We gave every employee the latest fitness tracker wristband. It helps them keep tabs on our 35-step-per-day limit."

'Harold arrives home from work early now. He solved all his commuting and exercise problems at once.'

'Trust Me, I am an Estate Agent.'

Man cold medicine.

"Your god can't stop his own priests from raping children in his own churches. So what makes you think he can help you find your T.V. remote?"

'Seventy three percent of statistics are made up on the spot.'

'Regarding your skateboarding accident: I need a note from your wife as to why you did something so stupid.'

Skateboarding

Lonely Trump Rally in Tulsa

Dog on a skateboard.

"So is Cameron Diaz really a babe, or is that another thing we've been led to believe by the biased media?"