Sitting By The Pool Gifts

At this time I'd like to thank the man or woman who invented the parasol. Without it, an indoor rain shower might dilute this Mai Tai, hindering my ability to get my full Don Ho groove on.

On holiday.

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

Bring your own inflatable.

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"Shake! Good Dog."

"I’ve got to take this. It’s someone who isn’t obsessed with summer fun."

Lounging by the pool

"Mom, Mom, watch me!"

"I only need shade for my wine."

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

The real reason why flamingos are pink

'One more hangover like this and I'm going to have to claim for sickness during holiday absence.'

Hollywood Breakup

Bankside

"Can we get a bigger pool to accommodate all my floats?"

"Listen, pal, they're all emergencies."

Shallow End (Slightly innocuous statements) - Deep End (a little more weighty)

Thought bubble mirrors the cloud in the sky.

"Should we take pics of our feed for Instagram?"

'Now, dear, I spent 35 years pretending to look busy. I can't just quit overnight!'

"My feet are cold."

"One day he went for a swim in our infinity pool, and I haven't seen him since."

A gondolier clears leaves form a pool

"Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here."

Semi-naked A stripped Semi-trailer Truck sunbathing by the pool naked

Yep, you get to a certain age and you just want to fly south for the winter.

"Standing on one leg is easier than on two, but this far more relaxing."

'Some two-year-old is marking the pool for himself.'

One isn't snubbing One's wedding, One is merely celebrating One's wedding by topping up One's tan.

'Why would you need GPS? Have you suddenly forgotten how to get from the couch to the refrigerator?'

'My name is John and I haven't had a think for 36 days.'

'Gordon, ever since you were given a chair with wheels you've been seen less and less in the office.'

'Looks like we can stay another week after all.'

'Can't you tell people about our new swimming pool without saying I've 'gone off the deep end?''