Sitcom Aficionados Gifts

"At this point, I think a rich lightweight would be fine."

"I first felt truly Jewish when I saw Ozzie and Harriet on television."

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

'A sitcom has to be quirky or formulaic. There is no middle way.'

Applause

Humans Queue To Use Portable Toilet While Dogs Queue To Use Tree Portable Toilet

Comic,,,Drama,,,Laugh Track,

'-Not THE Queen Vic?'

"He looks just like your husband."

'Now that's Real TV!'

Situation Tragedy.

Beam me up. Scotty!

"BBC One’s Casualty has reached its 1000th episode. The long-running hospital drama is apparently very popular with viewers... But even more popular among jobbing actors."

"We get fantastic indoor facilities during the cold months."

'Everybody from Liverpool's a comedian.'

'Try one - they're crunchy on the outside with a chewy centre.'

"That's Reubens, he's an alternate lifestyle coach."

"Fish needs bigger hole."

Polterguest: "When is your brother going to leave? He's driving me crazy!"

Menopause and the City

Haywatch

'It was a very strange divorce — the judge got custody of my wife.'

John Cleese.

'Hey Dad, Mom's got a new hobby...still life painting...er, Dad?'

"If I had been on 'The Brady Bunch', which I wasn't, I'd have been Greg, whom I ain't"

'No, I've never been in a TV reality show. My reality is pretty well scripted by my wife, kids and boss.'

Before he was taken away, Dr. Stuart Trust was the last known doctor to make HOUSE CALLS.

'I've seen nothing I've liked since Victor Meldrew!'

'Well, kids -- I guess it all started to fall apart when they canceled 'Seinfeld'....'

"So I play this guy named Stan Snorkel who finds a big, gray poodle..."

Larry David

"I love this comedy. What's it called?"

'The pilot has collapsed! Does anyone here know how to fly?'

Surgeons prepare for the world's first loopendectomy. Objective: Remove that part of the brain that plays the same snippet of music over the over and over.