Singer's Angiogram Club Gifts

'For seventy-five more dollars we can turn this into a Singing Angiogram.'

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

Joe's 'Talent-Optional' Karaoke Bar

"A trillion bottles of beer on the wall, a trillion bottles of beer..."

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

The Walk of Shame

Supermarket Warehouse. At night, with just security here, the products sing classic karaoke. The orange juice is belting Elvis'"All Shook Up." Peanut butter and jelly performed a duet of "Love Will Keep Us Together." children's breakfast cereal sang "Sugar, Sugar." And sriracha sauce did a rendition of "Great Balls of Fire"! What song will the ground beef choose? Jimmy Buffett's "Cheeseburger in Paradise," of course!

Tenors

'Do we have any oldies but goodies that you would care to hear?'

Pirate King

Gorgeous Groovers.

His master's chill-out album

A singer being criticised

'Yes, doctor, I sang to her constantly as a baby. Her first words were ‘Gimme Ipod'.'

'Didn't I tell you to take up some hobby other than opera?'

"Sure, I can help you improve your mating call: that's my specialty..."

"Problem is, it's the only song he knows."

'He uses the leg rope in the water and she uses it out of the water!'

"The meal was delicious. My compliments to the Haematologist"

'Uh-oh, here comes the mike again. Cut the barbershop quartet and go back to mournful whistling.'

Well, it's not my fault if nobody bothered to tune the microphone.'

"Sorry - you're just not my type...!"

Old McDonald bed & breakfast...NO EIEIOing after 10PM.

'Our new director is also a choir director. He will lead us in singing our company fight song.'

'You like that? Okay, ONE MORE TIME! The wheels on the bus go round and round!...'

Girls night out. Dress up, liquor up...throw up.

Man holds up giant disco ball on slope.

'Actually, I was thinking more blood group than personality.'

Syd Barrett.

Cows warming up.

'For God's sake, Tom, just let her cry - I can't stand your singing any longer.'

"Wine and women are off but can sing as much as you like!"

"Dad, it's only a surveillance camera."

'If you're so easily grossed out, why did you go to medical school?'

Last Call of the Wild