Shopping Satire Lover Gifts

'Bag? Any vouchers? Like a packer? If you have two of those... What type of apples are these?'

Mon emperor, the empress Josephine is requesting 10,000 francs for shopping. Tell her I'm a little short.

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

They get into debt so fast these days...

Pirates at the mall.

Don't tell my wife. Dragon head.

What if retail stores behaved like websites?

Seven deadly sins shopping plaza

"What would you suggest to fill the dark, empty spaces in my soul?"

"Once you break through the plastic clamshell and blister packs, there won't be any packaging left!"

"How much is the sign?"

'How do I know if it's seaworthy?'

"So the only way to save the economy is to spend what we haven't got - plus ca change - moin ca change!"

Med. Soc Sec. Can we agree on anything to reduce the deficit other than a bake sale?

Eye of Newt Helper

A sign outside the "Museum of Modern Gift Items" reads "T-shirts of the Masters Sale".

"We could go out to eat every night and cut our grocery bill to nothing."

'That's the last time I send you shopping!'

"Let's see now; rat's gizzard, bats wings, eye of newt....oh, yes. And cornflakes!"

Great moments in shopping

'Derek knew that someone, somewhere must have designed a car with a shopping basket.'

Shop signs.

'Darn it! The bar code doesn't seem to be working. . . flip him over and let's try the other side. . .'

Poor Holiday Gift Choice...The Lucifer 2500, Talking GPS Device.

"Footwear's upstairs, Sir"

'We guarantee you won't get your money back.'

"If there are more than two people in front of you - we will open another superstore."

'When will you learn? You're only paying for the label!'

"So if I'm to understand you correctly, this 'engineered athletic footwear' with its 'extended torsion system' is also a sneaker?"

"Classic ballcap $79.95. White, black, red or blue. Adjustable. One size fits all."

"Sometimes I like to browse the men's section just to screw with the patriarchy."

Mail-Order Yard Sale

Financial Christmas

Fresh milk - Self service

Holds leftovers, easy to carry... Gotta say, he almost had me. Right up to th 'Keeps food fresh' part. What a waste of a good idea.