Shellfish Enthusiast Gifts

Lobster Hot Tub

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"The fish sticks here are very good."

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

Mac's Bait and Sushi Shop

Odd Angles,a monthly strip on coarse angling.

Man Fishing: Pulling sign attached to hook from fish out of water: Gone Swimmin'

Hey, it's true, you really can hear the sea in these shells!

Your lobster was off!

"I was drawing a whale, but I ran out of paper."

The Jolly Green Giant Squid

"He's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes...like a DOLL'S EYES!!"

Clownfish entertain sea life by hitting each other in the face with octopi.

"... Oh, don't worry, I won't 'overcook it'... I hope you like, sushi."

The Da Vinci Cod

'This fish isn't tank broken - I want a refund!'

Al, why is my goldfish zigzagging? Perhaps sharing my beer with him was a case of misplaced generosity on my part.

'Redneck Goldfish' Earl knew better than to watch Oprah while drinking.

'I don't mind being caught,it's that kissing I hate.'

"Seriously, you looked so perfect that at first, I thought you were a lure..."

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

'First he warms our bowl, now he's feeding us... And you thought he wasn't friendly.'

"What do you suggest...the tuna fish or the peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich?"

Selfish shellfish - 'You kids share your food and stop being shellfish!'

'Why do I need to clean the fish? -- Didn't you just take them out of the WATER?'

"These are my fish cymbalta, otezla, skyrizi, vraylar and stelara!"

"How's the salmon?"

'Next Please...' (Joe's Sharpening Service).

"No, my consomme was perfect, but my husbands calamari is a little underdone."

'Fancy a liquid lunch?'

"Lap fish..."

"Still, you've got to admit our being swallowed by a fish has its humorous aspects!"