Sheepish Humor Lover Gifts

"Geez. Dude, is that steel wool?"

Army Leader: 'We have ways of making Ewe talk.'

"There you are... I've been talking to a cloud for the last half hour!"

Sheep In Curlers

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

LAST-MINUTE CAMPAIGN STOP

Fellow Sheep of the Ring

"I'd have been here sooner if it hadn't been for early detection."

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

'Right now I'm counting the blessings that we owe to Uncle Sam.'

"Any qualifications other than speaking the language."

'So when the bottom fell out of sheep shearing I had to find something else...'

Quick, follow that star

'When you said 'See ewe in my office' sir, I thought...'

"The guy I bought him from says he's a pure sheepdog."

"Yeah, I won the Finest Quality Wool award, but it was a tough competition: There were contestants from all over Australia and New Zealand..."

"And in the beginning Mary begat a little lamb"

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

Dolly, Twenty Years Later

"My parents hate it."

"T.G.I.F."

Triple Sock Cow

'How are the cloning experiments of shepherds going?'

"EWE-BUR" "SHEAR-X"

"Well, the census results are out, but a footnote says that the sheep count is probably inaccurate as the auditors often found themselves getting drowsy..."

'Just the usual, thanks.'

'Yeah, they're neat tattoos, but they're only visible at shearing time each year...'

Sheep-farts contribute to global warming...

"Oh, God, it's the Herefords, pretend we don't see them."

Sheep of the 1970's

Riding School: Horse eating a compendium.

Em-Eews: Emus and Ewes in the form of each other.

"Not sure that's the graven image of Baal we were looking for."

'This is one way to 'round-'em-up!'

How Sheep Sleep