Shark Watching T-Shirts

"You see, if we learn to swim upside down, they won't see us coming..."

Bite out of fishing pier.

'Now slow down for a minute...I can hear you just fine, but what does 'Gargle! Gulp, Gargle!' mean?'

'Chuck, no! Keep circling. I love this part.'

"Dad, Dad, cage divers! Get the hacksaw and let's scare the heck out of them!"

"Wow, 27, not bad! Me, I've ruined 53 surfing competitions..."

"Yeah, I've been radio-tagged by scientists, so once a week, out of spite, I do something irrational just to mess up their data..."

"I like the way they come on their own serving trays."

"Of all the hundreds of islands I could get washed up on, I get to land on Hell's Island."

"And this flag, my son, means "Divers Below"..."

"Honestly, Edna, he just wasn't worth it!"

'Yeah, I know, but don't worry, I've scared the living daylights out of him: He'll never spear-fish again...'

Hammerhead shark

'Chuck, no! Keep circling. I love this part.'

Sand sailing in the Sahara

"We're saved! We're saved!"

To the Aquarium

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

The Zoo.

Tourists

Beach con-man.

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Now I really hate poetry."

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

'I don't care if it's hot, I won't go in the water!'

Special offer on snakeskin ties.

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

"I was drawing a whale, but I ran out of paper."

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."