Sex Ed Salesperson Gifts

"It's time I explained the Birds and Bees and PMS to you."

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'You know they've reached puberty when they're more interested in Dr. Ruth than Babe Ruth.'

"It says here that humans are the only member of the animal kingdom who can have sex any time, any place."

'If we respect each other, contraception makes sense!'

Sex Education

The sperm and the egg: romance in action

"We're going to start with the birds and the bees and then work our way up to the new reproductive technologies."

'What's oriole sex'

"I don't really know much about safe sex. I skipped the fourth grade."

"This 'birds and bees' stuff,' Dad - Has it been fact-checked?"

"Oh yes, the stags fight and prance around to impress us, but in the end, we decide who we mate with: we have the power!"

"You are here."

"Dad, where did I come from? The stork?"

'Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize 1 egg?'

"It was time you learned."

The future Mario Andretti about to be conceived

'I have a question...am I a bird or a bee?'

"Buddy, no! Remember what they taught us in sex ed!" "Don't care."

"Well then, can I at least call you sometime?"

"The vampire can come... I'm prepared!"

"I know all about the birds and bees, but what's all this about 'erectile dysfunction?'"

The Joy of Sioux

'I'm just waiting to see when I will be preoccupied with sex.'

'I believe the word you want is condom, not condemn ... unless you plan on having very unsafe sex.'

Sex Education: "Here's one we prepared earlier..."

'What sexual position produces the ugliest kids?. . . Ask your mum.'

AIDS prevention

"All I know is this sounds like the kind of thing that could get a political appointee in trouble."

'It's probably a hormonal thing.'

Department of Gender Studies

'We're studying child birth in sex education. On my birthday I think YOU should get the gifts.'

'Jeremy, you disgusting little pervert!'

'Aborting mission! Primary invasion force captured and enslaved!'

Tele Condom