Sequel Cynic Pillows

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'Everything is illusory? -- Even reality shows?'

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

"Since he's been a plagiarist, committed perjury and runs a Ponzi scheme, trust can be an issue."

'Our basic package is no frills, no chew toys, no extra Kibbles, and narry a pat on the head from management...'

"Let's wait for it to come out on cable and then not watch it."

"That script of yours - I've never read such a load of cliched second-rate crap...It'll make us rich..."

'You're King Kong? You look bigger in the movies.'

'Yes, but at least I don't fake the whole relationship.'

When Stupid People Get an Idea

'So to sum up this lengthy discussion: at the next meeting we'd prefer one platter of Brie and grape, one of honey glazed ham, and one of roast beef with wild horseradish - and NO cheese and pickle.'

"He's a widowed eighty-year-old billionaire with a 'Do Not Resuscitate' tattoo...what's not to like?"

"Oh well - same shit, different day. . .!"

"Hey - let's not us re-invent wheel."

'The dip in profits here is attributed to the purchase of this projector and screen.'

Obama builds own gallows.

'Here - The Royal Safety Council said you have to wear this.'

"I've seen this film ten times and it's still awful."

"Where's that special cartridge we use to print campaign promises...the one with disappearing ink?"

"Oh, the usual bills and a friendly reminder from Satan that there's a special place in Hell reserved just for us, but only if we ACT NOW, blah, blah, blah."

"And in this section it appears that you have not only alienated voters but actually infected them, too."

'Stock prices are down; Bond prices are down; North Korea are threatening nuclear war...have a nice night's sleep.'

'Our government is comprised of three branches - politicians, lobbyists, and the media.'

'The following program may not be suitable for those of you who are sick and tired of politics....'

'These are fine, but what's in it for me?'

'I had it all - then the IRS found where I had it hidden.'