Seminar Show-off Gifts

"I attended a leadership seminar. They learnt a lot from me."

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

"Yes, Jane Lyons, sitting next to Katy Jones, class of 2018, it is important for a writer to know her audience."

'I thought people were quite receptive to the change seminar.'

"Wow, your mane looks fantastic! New conditioner?"

Substance Abuse Seminar: How Not To Get Hooked!

Graph leads down into egg with a big crack.

"The sound system is fixed so we can start. Would you kindly put the beach ball away!"

'Success in business door' - keep your finger on the button doorbell.

'What's the chance of getting a latte around here?'

'I don't offer any free advice anymore. I am offering a self-help seminar and a motivational coaching program online.'

'I sent an employee to a motivational seminar once. He came back and took my job.'

'Selling a stock and marking a profit is better than selling it at a loss, if only for the bragging rights.'

"Please refrain from throwing business cards."

'He's a control freak but the treats are good.'

"Maybe there's a free lunch, too?"

I'm afraid we had to cancel the 'perfect planning' seminar. we forgot to book the hotel until it was to late and the speaker we'd hoped to use died in 1958

'You wouldn't listen to me. You have to buy the biggest tree in the lot!'

Today's seminar is going to be so much fun...

'Nobody turned up to the 'effective communications' seminar...they didn't get our memo.'

'Since we initiated regular staff development sessions, we've turned the school around 360 degrees.'

"Frankly I was expecting something a bit more sophisticated..."

"I believe we have a question from our CEO."

"So what really motivates your colleagues?"

"Because we're jerks."

'George, are you SURE this is the seminar we signed up for? I haven't heard a single word about managing cash flow in a small business!'

"If anyone wants me I'll be on the shop floor strutting my stuff."

"Oh, me? I gave a seminar, wrote a unch of grants, did some experiments and now it's lunchtime."

'I SAID-what's wrong with a RATTLE like the rest of us?'

'Before I answer your question, let me briefly review my list of strategies for dealing with difficult people.'

'Norman needed some help with his presentation technique'

Get rich quick giving seminars!

"And then you stick out your thumb like this."

"Here's your words for today ladies."