Self-help Fanatic Gifts

With both meetings scheduled to end at 3 pm, a perfect storm was brewing.

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

Self help acupuncture

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

"Tonight! Author book signing." "Develop your inner raging bitch."

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

"Teach yourself what you don't know you don't know."

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

"I can motivate everyone except myself."

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

"Do you have any of those books that understand men?"

Relationship Warning Lights

Understanding The Other Side, Whether Men, Women, or Mice.

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

What else is there to wish for?

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

Window Treatment

'If you want to live a long time, try not to do anything that will kill you.'

Bookstore, the Politically Incorrect Guide to You.

"You've reached Randy the love doctor. What ails you?"

Introducing... The Everything Else Morning-After Pill!

"I can't get used to being a grownup."

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

'I think I just had an epiphany. How do I make it go away?'

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

"Yet she never gains an ounce."

"The doctor will be with you two in a second. As for you, I'd recommend a motivational speaker."

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'