Self-defence Enthusiast Gifts

"Yes dear, I know I've been taking self-defence classes to deal with this kind of situation. But this is my karate instructor."

"What colour do you have to get before the big kids leave you alone?"

'You realize, of course, there's a seven-day waiting period.'

Mod Kwan Doh

KAWAII T'AI CHI

Martial Arts

'Not only do I have a black belt in karate, I also have a husband in the hospital to prove it!'

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

"Today you will learn the 'Paper Cut' technique."

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

Joan of Arc goes sword shopping.

Wilbert wished he's taken those karate classes instead.

Martial Arts

'Iraq had no WMD's? Iran has no nukes? Surely there must be some terror-producing country to keep Americans frightened, and in support of big defense spending!'

'So the guidance suggests that if anyone threatens you, throw it them.'

"Ohhh... He's out all right!"

'Watch it, I'm a black belt.'

Ancient Weapons

"I can assure you, Your Honor, that my client knocked over the liquor store with the best of intentions."

Martial arts and clumsiness.

No one liked working the red-eye shift.

U.S Airspace missile detection meets Santa

'I hear a burglar downstairs, the poor fool.'

"I don't like the looks of this! That's our jury consultant!"

"War is hell...but peace is hell for the defense budget."

Pete Hegseth Military Caricature

'I'd go small with this burglar. Way too much collateral damage with the cannon.'

'I don't know if I could really do that to a man.'

Green Belt

Strategic Metals and Non-Strategic Metals.

How NOT to solve the problem of 'floating elbow' in your taiji

Defense Spending.

"Paint a message on it? Do you know how much these missiles cost soldier?!?"

'Wow, I'll earn my black belt in no time.'

"Self defence manual"