Self-care Comedians Gifts

With a distinct lack of hair, Ed had to approach his comb over from a different angle.

The new piece of the armor of God, "the facemask of fearlessness."

10K Run: Smoker's Lane.

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

Improve your leaping ability or your money back.

Bald Man Overcomb

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

Lady Liberty's Self-Care

"Try to eat more coconuts and fish."

'Can you make me taste like broccoli?'

"I hear a pet can help prolong your life. Got any that know the Heimlich maneuver?"

"Last week, when I was telling you about my Lou Ferrigno dream, were you fighting off a yawn? Do you go to therapy? What would you do if I touched your ear? Yes or no—am I insane?"

Bald man polishing head

'Oh, great... Big date tonight and I've got a zit on my nose.'

'Your lab tests are back. Your cholesterol weight, and self importance are all too high.'

"This one is called 'Essence of Hockey Bag.'"

'How much have you lost so far?', '$375.00'

'We can only offer you our basic dental plan: this dental floss and a pack of sugar-free gum.'

"I think that form '10,000' steps may have been 9,999 too many!"

'I wonder if we're getting enough fibre?'

'No, Neville. I don't think anyone will ever open a burger bar around here. Now, finish your carrion!'

'Time for your One-a-Year vitamin supplement pill, dear.'

"The sleeping pills take time to work. Don't expect results overnight."

Bald hairdresser recomending hair restoring lotion

'Surgeon General's warning on junk food! Lighten up a little!'

'If his chart dips down to 15 here, he'll start emitting a hellish, non-stop squeal.'

Your cough IS unproductive, but I'm more concerned by your unmotivated sneezes, your apathetic earache, and your sniffles' overall lack of ambition.

"Oh, the doctor told you not to work so hard, did he?... And does the doctor pay your salary?!"

'Your halo didn't slip. You've got ring around the collar.'

"I'm just messing with you."

"Wash and Quo"

'Before I serve any food, please sign this waiver of legal liability for making you obese.'

M.D. I think of my body as a temple! I think you should decrease the building fund.

'It's a filthy and nasty habit, but at least, you won't end up with yellow teeth...'