Sediment Sleuth T-Shirts

Stratigraphy

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

"I need to self isolate. . . but I thought I'd better come in and see you first!"

'The dog ate my homework -- I thought maybe you could X-ray him.'

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

"I'm in my third day of trying to figure out which little square I am."

Medical Library - Large books with really revolting photographs

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

"How 'local' is the fish?"

'I was working on developing anti-matter under laboratory conditions, but I couldn't find anything to keep it in.'

GM Crops Genie.

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."

Undercover Biophysicists

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

Newton's Law and Order.

Galileo describes his discoveries to the church (and gets hit over the head by the bishop/pope with the telescope that he made the discoveries with).

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

Schrodingers cat at the vets

'She didn't notice it was a wolf and not her grandma?? Had grandma never heard of electrolysis??'

"I have my green thumb, thanks to my black 'n' blue knees!"

"The search for a new painkiller has been a real headache."

'I could have sworn I put those moon rocks in my pocket...'

'Trying to steal secrets again, Dr. Figowitz?'

"Light at the end of the tunnel!"

'It's Yorick all right - I know his DNA well.'

Professor Yomp is working overtime, trying to find a synthetic rhino horn.'

Welsh water sewage

Genetically-Modified Foods: Are they safe?

'Leaves glow away...Apples fall to the ground...Ah, ha. Apples are heavier than leaves.'

'...but our most useful publication is the 'Journal of Don't-Do-It: It's-Already-Been-Done.''

"In science class, we learned that a solar eclipse is not due to a rolling blackout."