Specimen Sleuth T-Shirts

'I could have sworn I put those moon rocks in my pocket...'

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

$1: Family Secrets

'It's not for myself, you understand."

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

'Have you no common scents?!'

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

"I need to self isolate. . . but I thought I'd better come in and see you first!"

'The dog ate my homework -- I thought maybe you could X-ray him.'

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

Stratigraphy

"Do you smell something?"

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

'No, that's not my shaving lotion. We've been burning cow chips in the wood stove.'

Medical Library - Large books with really revolting photographs

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

IRS, 'I think we should audit this one, sir -- his signature looks shaky.'

GM Crops Genie.

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."

'It's for the girl who's in a hurry.'

Undercover Biophysicists

Newton's Law and Order.

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

Galileo describes his discoveries to the church (and gets hit over the head by the bishop/pope with the telescope that he made the discoveries with).

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

'She didn't notice it was a wolf and not her grandma?? Had grandma never heard of electrolysis??'

'How come the rabbit didn't have good luck with the foot?'

Schrodingers cat at the vets

'(Sniff!)... Hey! Somebody stole my identity!'

'It's Yorick all right - I know his DNA well.'

Professor Yomp is working overtime, trying to find a synthetic rhino horn.'

Genetically-Modified Foods: Are they safe?

"Light at the end of the tunnel!"