Pollution Sleuth T-Shirts

Welsh water sewage

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

"I need to self isolate. . . but I thought I'd better come in and see you first!"

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

'The dog ate my homework -- I thought maybe you could X-ray him.'

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

Medical Library - Large books with really revolting photographs

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

The Modern Godot

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

GM Crops Genie.

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."

Undercover Biophysicists

Newton's Law and Order.

Galileo describes his discoveries to the church (and gets hit over the head by the bishop/pope with the telescope that he made the discoveries with).

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

'Okay - Let's crash that bad boy.'

'She didn't notice it was a wolf and not her grandma?? Had grandma never heard of electrolysis??'

Schrodingers cat at the vets

No, you were supposed to check the doorbell camera before lowering the drawbridge.

'It's Yorick all right - I know his DNA well.'

"The search for a new painkiller has been a real headache."

Genetically-Modified Foods: Are they safe?

'Trying to steal secrets again, Dr. Figowitz?'

"Light at the end of the tunnel!"

Professor Yomp is working overtime, trying to find a synthetic rhino horn.'

Happy Face Grows Third Eye.

'Leaves glow away...Apples fall to the ground...Ah, ha. Apples are heavier than leaves.'

'...but our most useful publication is the 'Journal of Don't-Do-It: It's-Already-Been-Done.''

"In science class, we learned that a solar eclipse is not due to a rolling blackout."

Exportation and importation in Cuba