Security Technician Gifts

Man installing a burglar alarm,

"We've installed false alarms in all the offices."

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

'Where was the TSA?'

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

"OK, you're good and just the guy we need in security."

"He's a guard dog."

Dog barking at everything except a burglar.

"I see you've security marked your property."

"You work well without supervision? Fat chance of that happening in here!"

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

Dogs stealing cat food - Vice Squad orders 'Stay!'

Privacy Conference Security

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

Shaped Much Different: Vietnam and Afghanistan.

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

"So, how was your day at work, Dear?"

"Ok, I found a secure line."

"I spy with my little eye…"

AI Safety Officer

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

Pile of top secret files on a train. Man saying 'Is that seat free'

"Beware of Don"

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

The lion statues in front of New York City Library are replaced with spies.

"The club scene is really changing."

"I say we move on to dessert."

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

Watchdog on Holiday

'Says here you can tear phonebooks in half? Well, security could use a man like you in our shredding department!'

Graffiti on guard's horse