Sec Sleuth T-Shirts

'Your company raised the red flag when you purchased the super duper paper shredder.'

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

$1: Family Secrets

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

Clickbait

'What an execrable day. I got drenched in a Wiki leak and buried in a document dump.'

'Should I just hit 'reply to all' and save the government the trouble?'

Help!!! I've been kidnapped - Your Money.

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

'Today, the market did the 'Ol' Dipsy, but recovered in the 'Doodle'.'

The Modern Godot

'Gimme all your cache!'

'Oh my God! You look like you've see the FTSE.'

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

"It's the age-old question of our existence, Bill: 'Why does bad data happen to good computers?'"

Secret Service Dogs

"I'm majoring in Communications with a minor in Leaking!"

"Our stock is down. Start some rumors on Wall Street that it's going up."

'This morning a rumor that we would buy the Arpex Corp drove our stock up $3. Around noon a rumor that Arpex would buy us drove it up another $3. And in the afternoon a rumor that wo have nothing to do with Arpex drove it up $3 more.'

"Password must contain at least one pictograph."

Efrain Rios Montt sentence overthrown.

"Officer, someone hacked my bluetooth pressure cooker and blew my kitchen apart! What can I do?"

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

Two men converse secretively

'Roughly translated it says 'Can't remember the code to get into your pyramid? Call Pharaoh Locksmithing.'

'Always bought low.'

What security flaw?

'This model sends back a pre-recorded message to any hacker.'

"I'm all for security, but you having an 80-factor authentication may be a little over the top."

"Don't mind me. I'm just nosy."

'I've only just learned to read, and I'm already on page twelve of my sister's diary.'

'Remember, all these security cameras are for YOUR protection...otherwise, I'd come over there and smack you.'