Sec Sleuth Gifts

'Your company raised the red flag when you purchased the super duper paper shredder.'

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

$1: Family Secrets

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

Clickbait

'What an execrable day. I got drenched in a Wiki leak and buried in a document dump.'

'Should I just hit 'reply to all' and save the government the trouble?'

Help!!! I've been kidnapped - Your Money.

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

CIA. Office of Disinformation. Please Use Other Door.

The Modern Godot

'Today, the market did the 'Ol' Dipsy, but recovered in the 'Doodle'.'

'Gimme all your cache!'

'Oh my God! You look like you've see the FTSE.'

"It's the age-old question of our existence, Bill: 'Why does bad data happen to good computers?'"

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

"I'm majoring in Communications with a minor in Leaking!"

Secret Service Dogs

"Password must contain at least one pictograph."

"Our stock is down. Start some rumors on Wall Street that it's going up."

'This morning a rumor that we would buy the Arpex Corp drove our stock up $3. Around noon a rumor that Arpex would buy us drove it up another $3. And in the afternoon a rumor that wo have nothing to do with Arpex drove it up $3 more.'

No, you were supposed to check the doorbell camera before lowering the drawbridge.

"Officer, someone hacked my bluetooth pressure cooker and blew my kitchen apart! What can I do?"

Efrain Rios Montt sentence overthrown.

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

I'm loving the phone hacking scandal. I love it when ne'er-do-wells use technology to steal personal information. Because you like when people suffer. No. Because I love it when technology is proven as evil. Spare me. Technology is not evil. People are evil. Computers don't hack people. People hack people. Macs hack, Macs hack! You watch your mouth, filthy human! Fight, fight …

What security flaw?

Two men converse secretively

'Always bought low.'

'Roughly translated it says 'Can't remember the code to get into your pyramid? Call Pharaoh Locksmithing.'

'This model sends back a pre-recorded message to any hacker.'

"I'm all for security, but you having an 80-factor authentication may be a little over the top."

"Don't mind me. I'm just nosy."

'I've only just learned to read, and I'm already on page twelve of my sister's diary.'