Privacy Sleuth Gifts

'I've only just learned to read, and I'm already on page twelve of my sister's diary.'

"Give me his phone for 7 minutes and I will give you the man."

"Management says it's definitely NOT employee surveillance. Instead, they call it 'free media exposure.'"

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

$1: Family Secrets

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

Clickbait

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

'What an execrable day. I got drenched in a Wiki leak and buried in a document dump.'

'Should I just hit 'reply to all' and save the government the trouble?'

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

The Modern Godot

Tiger discovers the online wildlife trade.

'Gimme all your cache!'

"It's the age-old question of our existence, Bill: 'Why does bad data happen to good computers?'"

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

"Officer, someone hacked my bluetooth pressure cooker and blew my kitchen apart! What can I do?"

"Hello, I am a Nigerian Prince and I need your help!!! Please send me $500 and your bank routing number. You will rewarded with 10% of 12.7 million dollars and my undying friendship. Best wishes, Prince John Barron."

"Password must contain at least one pictograph."

Secret Service Dogs

"I'm majoring in Communications with a minor in Leaking!"

I'd rather be phishing.

'Computer crime' 'To see your belongings visit our website www,burgular.com'

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

'...if he only knew what I wrote about him on my blog.'

What security flaw?

"We've gleaned all we need to know about you from the internet, but we'll keep your resume as a great example of creative writing."

Able to Google Stuff Man

Two men converse secretively

'And what if I did doctor the documents? I'm a doctor.'

'Nice try buddy, but we know the score. You were involved, but you only played a small part. What we want to know is who orchestrated this thing.'

'This model sends back a pre-recorded message to any hacker.'

"He opened his email and saw the attachment from an unknown source. His hand slowly reached to click on the paper clip. He had no idea what horror awaited him. . ."

"I'm all for security, but you having an 80-factor authentication may be a little over the top."