Search Engine Whiz Gifts

"Career plans? I'd like to go to college and major in googling."

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

Multi-tasking.

"Anna - there's someone I'd like to meet."

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

Nerd tryouts.

'WE use these computers to gather and organise data for our school district and, on a slow day, to play solitaire.'

'This computer has a fast modem, the latest Pentium, increased RAM, a huge hard drive and broadband connections. Only one problem...slow pointer fingers.'

'Yep,that's it Mr.White. And NOW go, Control-Alt-Delete, then re-enter.'

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

'My dog ate my computer.'

"The Wi-Fi password is publish 'publish or perish'."

GO AHEAD ... MAKE MY DAY!

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

STRIP Hambone: Workers help is a hindrance

"After a long day at the office writing business software...Bob loves to relax writing game software."

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

"The results are impressive, but it'll be decades before we can transmit and receive pornography."

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

'I'm afraid you've failed the Turing test.'

'Those enormous worldwide internet communities.'

"I love the fact that you're a computer genius, Erwin. I just don't like fact that you look like one."

'My new browser is so fast I have to take motion sickness pills.'

Computer making faces behind owner's back.

I've always been slower than computers...

You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it.

"What's that you're reading?"

"Are you sure you updated the anti-virus software?"

Kevin had a computer virus.

'Hey, everyone! Guess who forgot his password?'

'Your car should run fine now. I reformatted the hard drive, increased the ram, scanned for viruses, updated the firmware, upgraded to this year's processor...'

"A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer."

Washroom Doors: Men, Women, Computer Whiz.

"I'm tardy? Whew! I was afraid I was going to be late for school!"

Apex Dictionaries Co - sign reads: Clowsed,bak at too.