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Writer's Block Party

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

Instructional guide to scribbling

'You could do that.' I did

"So, Sandra, what can you tell us about your lovely mood board?"

Bob woke up in a pile of notes, some scrawled so quickly that no one could decode them. He remembered nothing of the night before, except... yes, a fleeting glimpse of the writer's moon.

"Your editor called again to see if the well was still dry."

'To you it's wine, to me, it's my writer's block vaccine.'

'Is this any way to treat a budding genius?'

Writer: Humour and Tragedy.

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

On the cusp of winning the Nobel, Bernie gets exposed by his third grade handwriting teacher.

"Where do you get your derivative ideas?"

Meet the Shameless Self-Promoter 2 PM

'Two men having a sword fight with large pen and pencil.'

'Don't be hard on the boy, dear, I'm sure that Van Gogh's first sunflowers weren't so hot.'

Now that I've written the book, could you put in a good word with the sales team's muse?

Congress today convened a special panel to study use of illegal performance enhancing drugs on the senior Scrabble tour. Members of Congress expressed outrage that such a national pastime could be sullied by fiber doping. Their anger led to an angry exchange with one witness. Hey Congress, here's a four-letter word … Turn off her mic.

"I'm afraid he's right-there's nothing in here about slobber balls."

'Pencil for Cartoonists.'

Writer’s Corner

"If you kids want to grow up to be writers, it's time we give you something to write about."

'Hey! We can play Scrabble while we eat!'

'I see a VERY important note from your doctor. Unfortunately, I can't read her handwriting.'

'Of course this scribble doesn't make any sense. Why do you think the critics call it an intellectual masterpiece?'

"It's the worst case of writer's block Sidney has ever had. He hasn't put a word on the page since fifth grade!"

Campus police are dorm troopers.

"Would you like to squiggle here something that no-one in a MILLION years would be able to read!"

The NFL is forced to add a new penalty to the rule book.

Kate Atkinson

'GIT!!!'

"We have pills for some of that."