Screen Wizard Gifts

"Hey Rudy, you've been in there for over a hour. You ok in there?"

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

The Googler

ZOOM 'n' GLOOM.

Piano Recital

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

"It's my intelligence, talent and hard work that have got me to the top."

Texturing the Walls

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

"Siri, find an ICU near me."

Technology and literature

'Not only will it do the work of ten people, it will scare 40% more work out of the rest of the employees.'

The Move.

'When I registered for this class, in computer programming, nobody told me that it's all about converting caffeine into computer code.'

Tech support...can I help you!

'They might as well sleep all day - all they do is stare at that screen.'

A sign outside a bookstore reads: "Meet the people in the bookstore cafe staring at their laptops 2-4 p.m."

Computer Music

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

'Your training will be the next five minutes watching my fingers move at the speed of light.'

Start the session by doing something unusual.

A Meeting of Computer Buffs.

'I think I set the security level, on my anti virus software, too high. Whenever I access anything it is automatically deleted.'

I got the raise

Club DJ.

Manual Labor.

"That's a zombie, alright. But he's the worst kind. He doesn't eat brains, he eats data."

"I'd like you to consider some of our exciting career opportunities working for anyone else but me."

Better Living Through Technology

"I'd love to chat, Dave, but unless it's high-powered, high-quality, high-finance, high-tech chat, I just don't have the time."

'We're not interested in how you work with people, just computers.'

"Good morning - your neighbours have asked me to come and tune your piano."