School Reunion Enthusiasts Gifts

"School's out! Nite club.

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

'You must have been wearing your beer googles.'

"Political Science... that's in the Department of Performing Arts."

"I'm sorry, but you didn't recognize me as the Messiah when I had braces and glasses."

'Where Are They Now?'

Man, Lemont … how long's it been? Twenty years? Just about. You still working at Pigville Pork Burgers? Nah … I got a job as the Candorville Chronicles White House correspondent. Then I went on to found Candorville.com, the internet's seventh largest source for news and opinion. Oh. That's cool. That's cool. How do you not know this? We're Facebook friends. I post links to my articles every day. We were roommates all through college, and you don't even read my updates? Facebook's for reading yo

'Remember me, Fred? I sat next to you in class and you said I'd never amount to anything.'

Cambridge dons eat a banquet outside to prove they only get one chicken each.

'I'm on the short degree course... hell of a lot to pack into one year!'

'Yes I think we did go to school together. Wasn't you the old headmistress?'

College game crowd: 'WE WON',,,'and that somehow makes you superior'

Bro of Frankenstein

"I love college."

Original punks go to reunion

Do Not Pass. Just like high school.

Monkey Business College

I conduct comprehensive surveys - I ask my girlfriend.

'I missed my roommate so I went out and got this spray called, 'Never Showers,' and now it's like she never left.'

'We have reason to believe you have been binge drinking and urinating in the area'

"My parents taught me stuff until I was six, and then they outsourced me to Central Elementary."

"... And since then, I've been quietly stalking you."

Littletown High School. And that's where Bubba Parker stomped me

The Presidential Physical Fitness Test

Community College. History's a lot more fun if you think of it as gossip.

"I didn't think you'd make it through biology."

'I see you're still copying from other people's papers, Billy.'

"Helen?"

Class Reunion. Back in school, Ernie was the world's biggest Beatle fan! For the reunion, he's written songs about some of our classmates. There's a cheesemaker

'I just got back form a class reunion!'

"Okay, it was a mean trick....but it was funny when I told John Gregory that used to be Tom Flynn!"

"It does seem like a school-approved activity."

'Of course I remember you-Tomkins,the Peter Pan of the Lower 4th!'

"Is it okay if I dissect this ham sandwich?"

"I've been able to pay attention a lot more in class since the teacher separated us."