School Hustler Gifts

"May I skip the usual Show & Tell and try to hustle some merch?"

Kar Boot Sale (child's toys).

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

"Hello, Pine Grove Elementary? Could you tell Miss Pritchard to come to Lakeview Veterinarian Clinic right away?"

'Would you all please congatulate...'

'An essay on what I did last summer? -- I was hoping to let all that stuff blow over.'

Pull an all-nighter?

'If history keeps repeating itself, why do I have to repeat this class?'

'I'm in the den, mom, reading the newspaper for my social studies class.'

'The bad news is you failed all your courses. The good news is you passed the urine test.'

We interrupt this program to bring you, Tommy, a message from you teacher. Have you finished your report on frogs?

Engineer on the move.

Interning in D.C. Volunteering in Seattle. Trekking in Nepal. Lucky ducks! I'm stuck here working 2 jobs! Wow! You're getting paid?!! Who knew? Employment is this summer's must-have status symbol. Some parents envy you.

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

"It's not my fault! Tariffs on lemon imports have forced me to increase my prices."

"I'm putting myself through med school by waiting tables. I'll be back shortly to take your blood pressure."

'Homework done only $1.00' 'Homework eaten only $0.50'

Homework Done and Homework Eaten Stands.

'You're kidding... I've got a masters in philosophy too!'

"Don't pull any wisdom teeth. I need all the help I can get in school."

'Yes, that's our bathroom. We're a startup, so plumbing and running water is a luxury.'

'Would you believe, I didn't get my homework done because of PMS?'

'I did my homework on my computer and before I could print it, it crashed.'

"Let's face it, if we were getting any customers they'd have been here by now."

'You know you're doing your job right when both coaches are mad at you.'

"Let's not forget one thing—theirs is California money."

"It started out as a joke but I've made twenty bucks ... "

'I was on my way to school, and some drug-crazed hippies took my homework.'

A salesman father waves to his son at the maternity ward.

'He's even better when he takes the cue out of it's case.'

"Miss, the cloud swallowed my homework."

"Give my kid a passing grade and you could be looking at many more nice apples."

'I quit the ice cream stand last year. Now I'm double dipping.'

'You want a raise? - You only started work yesterday!'

The housing market begins to deflate.