Childhood Hustler Gifts

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

Kar Boot Sale (child's toys).

"May I skip the usual Show & Tell and try to hustle some merch?"

'Would you all please congatulate...'

'At least I don't have his life.'

Engineer on the move.

"It's not my fault! Tariffs on lemon imports have forced me to increase my prices."

"I'm putting myself through med school by waiting tables. I'll be back shortly to take your blood pressure."

'Yes, that's our bathroom. We're a startup, so plumbing and running water is a luxury.'

'Currently I've got lemonade, 7% CDs, Discount Brokerage and No Minimum Passbook Savings. I'm going to miss banking deregulation.'

"Let's face it, if we were getting any customers they'd have been here by now."

'Not one customer all day! What's the matter with this corner?'

"It started out as a joke but I've made twenty bucks ... "

'You've got plenty of time for a little prayer before you get to him.'

Man sees stand with kittens with sign, 'Free or best offer'.

A salesman father waves to his son at the maternity ward.

'He's even better when he takes the cue out of it's case.'

"Hey, bro...it's the least I could do."

'You want a raise? - You only started work yesterday!'

Take a peek 50¢

Small Business Loan of Pencils

'I quit the ice cream stand last year. Now I'm double dipping.'

'Business's sure a lot better since we started adding your Dad's stuff.'

'The good news is tomorrow is a brand new day. The bad news is I'll be spending it at work.'

"She's asking if it's fresh-squeezed. Should I tell her to f**k off?"

'I'd like to inquire about franchise opportunities.'

'Normally, Schowalter, I applaud initiative, but....'

'Dad, I've decided to make some money to supplement my allowance.' 'Good for you. Got a little mowing job?' 'Nope. A tip jar. And oh by the way, 15 to 20 percent is customary.'

'My parents say it will give me a sense of responsibility and pride in accomplishment. I'm looking at it as a 'get rich quick' scheme.'

'Portfolio evaluation; $2.50'

"Since we're a startup, we were hoping you would pay us to work here."

Feel the baby kick - 5 cents

'I can tell when we're in a recession - my allowance gets cut.'

Another promising young entrepreneur snuffed out by Big Lemonade

"And now, if I may, I'd like to put You on hold for a moment while I have a few words with Mammon."