School Event Celebration Gifts

The Middle-School Dance

'And this year's 'Inquisitive Learner Award' goes to...'

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

Yearbook

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

Paul goes home for the holidays

'You must be Jimmy's father . . .'

Now I'll open up the floor to questions and batsh*t crazy rants.

King of Music.

For our eco-night entertainment we have Kim's "Dance Against Global Warming," Zahir's "Rap for the Eco Cure" and Twig's "Post-Carbon Poetry Slam." How about you, Jason? I'll explain metal organic vapor deposition in solar panels. Well! We'll see who's into heavy metal.

'Oh, Christ.'

'In a slight change to the programme, the second year jazz quartet aren't playing 'Hello Dolly'. They are however playing truant!'

"Yay! School is done!!"

Thanks for the lift, Nana. Don't get any big ideas about acting. It's just a high school musical. I guess you aren't coming back to see the show. Correct. Tonight! Cats! Spring musical. That's ok. Slam! I'm parking now to get a front row seat!

Science fair judge sees flower pot broken on floor near sign saying 'gravity'.

Our eco-prom theme is "Jungle Paradise." Decorations will be live plants. I see where this is leading. Can you bring in trees and bushes for the night? Sure. But

Don't make me look! How do you like my prom dress? Don't make me look! Chill, dad, it's Nana's old dress. It isn't revealing, Honey. It's no the old dress. It's my old little girl I can't look at!

'Oh, we don't actually teach math any more ? we found it was too hard on the kids' self-esteem.'

'I will be a chaperone at the senior prom. I need a prom dress but I don't want to be mistaken for a student.'

"Hard to believe that school's almost over."

"When do the kids go back to school?" "Oh, I don't know... 8 days, 16 hours and 47 minutes... or so."

Prom Theme: Coronavirus

Giant cat at school open night.

"Very effective talk on the power of non-verbal communication."

"Give my kid a passing grade and you could be looking at many more nice apples."

"My parents appreciate teachers, but me, not so much."

'An egg and spoon race! That's horrible!'

"At last...after so many missed days...so many cruel days apart...we are together once again!"

What?! No way are we pushing for a green prom. Eco-club. Do we have to take the fun out of everything? People will totally embrace it if we frame it in the right way. Like? Saving energy by turning the lights down really low! Or using fewer chaperones. I can deal!

Science Fair: 'We need a new rule - all projects MUST be in a container!'

"There's always one kid that spoils the class picture."

Pinata Pranks

Our dance has to be sustainable. I'll send electronic invites. Eco Club. We can hang white LED Christmas lights. The food will be seasonal! Ice cream? W. Fester School.

Children lining up for face-in-a-hole school photograph.

"Are there any questions about the Battle of Austerlitz?"