School Year Celebrations Gifts

"My parents appreciate teachers, but me, not so much."

'And this year's 'Inquisitive Learner Award' goes to...'

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

Yearbook

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

Today we learned to count to one.

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'

"Do you think that will count as our 'Fifteen minutes of fame'?"

Paul goes home for the holidays

'Yes, grammar rules do evolve over time, but making up your own to 'stay ahead of the curve' won't work in this English class!'

"Today in school we learned how to glue!"

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

'You must be Jimmy's father . . .'

"I enjoy the one day of the school year...that I didn't forget to do my homework."

"There are days when I wish we'd never agreed to him changing his spots"

'I got a good place in my exams today. Right next to the radiator.'

"I'm the last to go home because my parents are still fine tuning their work-life balance."

Now I'll open up the floor to questions and batsh*t crazy rants.

King of Music.

'An actual History lesson is set for June...'

'I'm having a hard time balancing homework and family time.'

'Oh, Christ.'

"OK, hands up who’s vegan... lactose intolerant... peanut allergies..."

Snacks for Learners

'Don't just stand there, get into focus!'

Back To School

For our eco-night entertainment we have Kim's "Dance Against Global Warming," Zahir's "Rap for the Eco Cure" and Twig's "Post-Carbon Poetry Slam." How about you, Jason? I'll explain metal organic vapor deposition in solar panels. Well! We'll see who's into heavy metal.

'Trade you lunches?'

'In a slight change to the programme, the second year jazz quartet aren't playing 'Hello Dolly'. They are however playing truant!'

Playing dustbins

Science fair judge sees flower pot broken on floor near sign saying 'gravity'.

Our eco-prom theme is "Jungle Paradise." Decorations will be live plants. I see where this is leading. Can you bring in trees and bushes for the night? Sure. But