School Crossing Officer Gifts

'Have you gone power mad? It's Saturday.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

Please Drove Carefully.

Dog Crossing

Europe and immigration.

No jay walking.

Stop, Smell Roses (stop and smell the roses)

"No officer, I didn't what the speed limit was. Those signs were going by too fast."

"I don't care why you crossed the road! I do care however about "how" you crossed the road: without checking for cars first!"

Caution May Contain Nuts.

Crossing the Nachos Grande

Street signs you don't want to see.

One way only.

'Never, Ever...drive 56 mph on a 55 mph freeway in a sporty red convertible.'

Viva Belarus!

"For pity's sake, George - stop tooting and ask for directions!"

"I told you we'd be better off taking Canal."

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'

'Have a heart, officer... the little mite is starving!'

After I crossed the road, I began to ask myself why I did anything.

"Coffee...Cigarettes...Bubble gum..."

"No, officer, I don' t know how fast I was driving. I had my head sticking out of the window."

'Where's the circus, buddy?'

'Morning Larry, taking the kids to school? Have you still got the duck farm?'

"Being a crossing guard for a squirrel is exhausting!"

Back to school: The Horror,

'It's an idea whose time has come, Mr. Mayor -- 'drive-through traffic court'!'

'Now I don't know what it's like in New York, but this is Kansas city, and we follow the laws of physics out here.'

Speeding Forklift

Policeman giving paramedics a fine.

'Mostly we just block traffic.'

'I think we both know that's a decoy.'

Man guarding a written border.