School Counsellor Gifts

'You obviosly need anger management. All your texts are in caps.'

'Don't trust people Billy, they'll only hurt you.'

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

Ethics exam cheater.

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'I have this fear of the real world...'

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

'My name's Google and I'm being inundated with requests for information about every damn thing imaginable, by people I don't even know...It's endless!'

'Look, you can only do so much!'

'The BOSS sent me down to help rebuild your faith.'

'The meaning of communinication is the response we get'

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

America, are we learning anything?

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

Licensed Therapist

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

Bob had to confront his fear of butterflies.

"I bought it off the therapist who's helping me kick my compulsive shopping disorder."

"I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist."

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

Facts of life - The birds and the dogs.

'The iceman cometh too soon!'

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

Woman and pets with hair sticking straight up all enter Stress Management Clinic.