School Adventures Gifts

'And there goes the school window...'

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

'Hi, Miss Henderson, we did collage in class today. Can you drive me home?'

Need a Qualified Adult for Pooh Sticks

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'Boy, talk about psychobabbl!'

I will not talk in art class. I will not talk in art class. I will not talk in art class. I will not in art class. I will not talk in art class.

"Pfff, eating homework is nothing! My mum eats the clothes off the clothes line..."

The best PE teacher in the World.

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

'Who I played in Summer Stock.'

"Could you repeat that word?"

School trip little porters.

'Tommy's doing fine. I'm concerned about your poor fund-raising record. You sold only two magazine subscriptions and one measly candy bar.'

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

How did you get your parents to send you to Costa Rica this summer, Ingrid? By almost flunking Spanish. That's dire. Hardly! I'll party and practice my accent. Next year�remind me to bring my French grade down. Si!

'Look. Billy Curry did a nude!'

Patey's in a band! He's so cool!

"The first week of school is just review. You know. Scenes from last year's episode."

To lessen the strain on their backs, many students are opting for the new Velcro shirts.

SEX EDUCATION, 'It's a crazy idea, but it just might work.'

The Best Art Teacher in the World.

"I think my mom made me a tofu sandwich."

'It's exactly what I need to drive our only child to school at the end of the road.'

"If I can't use a calculator, may I use my Dad's old slide-rule?"

Lice outbreak at Jungle High (lion with a shaved head).

"And today children, Homer is going to show us his 'pressed fly and bug collection'."

I'd like to donate to your theater, but

"I turned five. That's why I'm here. What are you in for?"

'Cool!! Your Dad lets you take accordian lessons??!!'

Boy squashed under lawn roller.

"Yeah, I've noticed it too: Young Master's smell has changed a lot since he's become a teenager..."

'I'm NOT trying to break in and change my grades. I'm only trying to change the school lunch menu.'

'Ok, class, let's take attendance. Joey?'

'My Dad won't let me tell what I did on my summer vacation...he doesn't want anyone to know where he set up his offshore bank accounts.'