Scholarly Shenanigans Gifts

'Sure, we have an excuse. The school bus backed into the Principals car.'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

'He's not as studious as he looks - his backpack is full of comic books.'

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

Aerodynamics Lecture room.

The Frankenstein snowman.

"The favourite practical joke amongst Big Bang theorists"

'Dr. Nackschmerz has a very logical mind.' - 'Yes - in contrast to his body.'

"Forget about eating homework, I need you to carry my backpack!"

"Done Dad! I've hacked the dog's social media account and flooded it and his contacts with links to cat videos..."

'All the fourth grade guys took a blood oath not to learn anything during the summer.'

I wasn't cheating...I was getting a second opinion.

"And you say you've been erect for over 4 hours?"

The invention of baseball.

"If you upgrade this to an 'A' I think I can get you an extra $10,000."

"Ms. Thomas, you'll have to come pick up your son. He's swinging from the chandelier claiming that he can and will divide by zero."

'We've got it narrowed down to between three and twenty-three pounds.'

Student wrestling with life issues.

'Well, I guess a master's degree is a master's degree, even if it is in skateboarding.'

'Grab the wand! Grab the wand!'

'I got caught cribbing from Charley Jones' laptop!'

'Best way I know to decide who gets the research position.'

Student to mother: 'What a day. The health teacher left school sick, the debate team got expelled for fighting, the biology teacher dissected the school mascot, and the glee club, in general, went berserk.'

"Don't be fooled. He isn't a prince and he isn't you pal!"

"You might fake an illness at home, but here, only a fever makes her a believer."

"To be environmentally responsible I'm recycling my sister's old book reports."

Shooting a spitball at the Dean on graduation day.

The SAT test can wear you down.

A good school report at last...how much did it cost you?

'Oh, heavens no. I was merely speaking figuratively when I said that I wanted to break every bone in his body.'

'Hot! Hot!'

'I demand a second opinion!'

"The 'Maurice Q. Dinkelfrost Professor of Economics' really is an endowed chair even though we made up the name just to amuse ourselves."

'Mom got our cells mixed up again.'