Satrical Sage Gifts

Oscar Wilde

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

British savings accounts

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

Rich man vomiting euros to a beggar.

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

'Now that we've learned to talk, maybe we should establish some speech codes.'

Shakespeare's Lost Play: The Taming of the Pooch.

Welcome Association of Stage Builders.

"Quantum Physics"? How am I going to learn all of this stuff? A bit at a time?

Don't you see, Kreutzer? That's why we have all this literature. So you won't duplicate an experiment that's already been done, and there's no reason at all why you should be duplicating Smedly's experiments. After all, he shares a lab with you.

'Oh, yeah? -- Well, my true inner self can whip your true inner self!'

Voltaire

'You say it's a dramedy? We thought it was more of a coma.'

"Pastor, may we share a message with you about humility?"

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

Justice

The 11th Commandment

Bishop with a crozier case.

Sermon - why our religion is really better than yours.

Mitch learns he is not the brightest bulb in the chandelier.

"You've done it - you've come up with the perfect password."

"The truth? You can't HANDLE the truth!"

Greek Tragedy: 'Yes... we agree to further cuts in government spendings..!!!'

'How am I supposed to meditate with your nose whistling?'

Manspreading in Art

How To Cut The Defense Budget

'I'm all tired out from creating - let's just use NATURAL selection from now on.'

God finger

That's no big deal, a lot of people get Siskel and Ebert mixed up

'Wow! - Your diary is even more boring than MY diary!'

"Is there a dramaturge in the house?"

'It's a simple two-part strategy. First, locate the hills. Then head for them.'

'It will cure every ailment known to man, the only side effect is, you'll choke to death trying to swallow it.'