Satirical Storytelling Fan Gifts

"What a coincidence! I'm forwarding your request at this very moment!"

No damsels, but now we know who's been taking the Amazon packages off our porch.

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack -- Career Duck

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

Director/Action Man toy.

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

The Fourth Little Pig

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

Fabrique en Francais (Made in France).

What's normal?

"Actually, the district office is getting better results with a fresh garlic bagel."

" ... and peace be with you, although not likely."

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

'Taxes are going up, but that's no excuse to earn less, Mr. Syms.'

"No Frodo, we are still many leagues from Mordor. This is from a wildfire by I-5 west of Bakersfield."

Saint George and the Drag Queen

The Working Woman's Magazine

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

"The Chicken: Just another body type that shouldn't be permitted to wear yoga pants."

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

"I find that hugely offensive!"

On the brink.

The Snarky District

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

Parade of Businessmen

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

How am I abducting?

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

'Mom, don't you understand? Those collars are symbols of subservience and repression!'

Man cutting hedge next to two heads impaled on sticks. Signs beneath say 'You missed a bit' and 'You can do mine next'.

'I look forward to a bigger and bolder vision in my 2nd term.'

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."