Satirical_smiler Gifts

"I do enjoy group activities."

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'Taxes are going up, but that's no excuse to earn less, Mr. Syms.'

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

Crap from the future.

"Of course you can resign Ferguson. How would you like to buy back your freedom? Cash, credit card or easy payments?"

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

Trump Poutine

The Proust of Twitter

'We're going to need to find a scapegoat.'

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

'What did I tell you? There's always a catch to those bargain internet travel fares...'

Trump

US Credit: 'I'm down grading your credit rating...'

'Here, we don't need a retirement plan. If you do your job as we want it, you'll directly go from your desk to hell.'

'More government surveillance!'

"I sold my soul for about a tenth of what the damn things are going for now."

"Despite thoroughly scraping the celebrity barrel, that Orwellian nightmare Celebrity Big Brother is back on our screens again."

'And we'll give you all the carcinogens you can eat.'

'Would you do me the honour of becoming tax advantaged with me?'

The Thinker?

"Fact amnesty"

The Monroe Doctrine

"Ah...summer...and umbrellas as far as you can see...it reminds me of England!"

"The way you look at me, Craig... you really see me."

"There may be a moral equivalent of war, but, by God, there is not moral equivalent of money."

"I think I'm as patient as the next person, but my husband wouldn't stop saying 'yo,' so I shot him."

'Henry was an undecided voter four years ago when he entered that voting booth, and I'm still waiting for him to decide and come home.'

'Yes, I'm sure Latestagrossa is the patient's name, and not the disease!'

Honest Voting Stickers