Satirical Humor Geek Pillows

"I'm afraid we don't have a size 'delusional'."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

"Gee, thanks pal."

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'Taxes are going up, but that's no excuse to earn less, Mr. Syms.'

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

'We're going to need to find a scapegoat.'

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

"Honey, where did you put my Green Lantern cufflinks?!"

Trappist Monk Discord

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

Trump Poutine

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

'Oh, nothing's wrong -- I just expected Earthlings to be taller, that's all.'

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

'What does it say, Dad?'

'He doesn't like people walking in - try crawling.'

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

"Nous somme desir-eh, go, er, allez, erm, universitaire français, s'il vous plait."

'I don't think the employees like me.'

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

'What did I tell you? There's always a catch to those bargain internet travel fares...'

"I see the White House didn't lower the flag to half staff."

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

US Credit: 'I'm down grading your credit rating...'

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

HELLth Food Sprouts

'Here, we don't need a retirement plan. If you do your job as we want it, you'll directly go from your desk to hell.'