Satirical Humor Expert Gifts

Copycats

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

"Gee, thanks pal."

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

Skeptic Tank.

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

Trappist Monk Discord

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

"Actually, it's more like a mouse race."

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

"I condensed my painting to the pure essence of the message. What helps me a lot is the fact that I've got nothing to say at all."

'He doesn't like people walking in - try crawling.'

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

"Nous somme desir-eh, go, er, allez, erm, universitaire français, s'il vous plait."

'I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology.'

'I don't think the employees like me.'

"I'm gonna be a 'New Yorker' cartoonist. You're not supposed to understand it."

' It's a bit of an anti climax - I've washed it but I can't go any where ! '

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

'What does it say, Dad?'

"I see the White House didn't lower the flag to half staff."

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

HELLth Food Sprouts

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'