Satirical Comics Fan Gifts

'I think by arguing whether its a chopper, hatchet or axe, he's just playing for time.'

Maps to trophy buck's homes $10

Tax inspector for ordinary people vs. Tax inspector for multinationals.

Tory Leadership Race

"My dad's more disinterested in my upbringing than your dad..!!"

Postal worker goes postal

Wicked Stepmother's Day.

'Oh, he's not arrogant -- he's just illiterate.'

'I finally understood 'negative numbers' when the teacher said they're just like the US budget deficit.'

Cricket widow's revenge

'Look at me when I'm double-talking.'

"Thanks for auditioning, you're too dark for the part but we were really impressed at how well you conveyed 'frustration' "

Frog committing suicide.

"So, where'd you learn acupuncture, Doc?"

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'Taxes are going up, but that's no excuse to earn less, Mr. Syms.'

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

'We're going to need to find a scapegoat.'

Trump Poutine

'One final question: Have you ever been disciplined, investigated or suspended for integrity on the job?'

'What did I tell you? There's always a catch to those bargain internet travel fares...'

'And we have an employee wellness program. By not offering health insurance or sick pay, we encourage wellness.'

US Credit: 'I'm down grading your credit rating...'

'In the computer simulation he said he admired my candor and gave me a raise.'

'More government surveillance!'

'Here, we don't need a retirement plan. If you do your job as we want it, you'll directly go from your desk to hell.'

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"I sold my soul for about a tenth of what the damn things are going for now."

DOWN WITH THE KING!, 'Do you know what the PENALTY is for disturbing the peace during wartime?'

'Steve says that he doesn't understand why the liberals are so glum! They already have a majority.'

'And we'll give you all the carcinogens you can eat.'