Satellite Navigation Skeptic Gifts

Bicycle sat nav.

"Recalculating?? Just admit you're lost."

"Ignore your SatNav."

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

An alien in his space ship sees a space sign that says 'You are here'

I always play the GPS through the backseat speakers. That's were I'm used to receiving instructions.

"I don't like space."

"GPS? In case we get lost? Why would we need that? We're microchipped."

"Has our apologist been alerted?"

'This really is the road less traveled. I can't find it on my Google Map.'

Voice of GPS: 'Recalculating...'

"We must be in the wrong wing."

"This one's the anti-collision computer and that one's the GPS..." "But there's no room for me!"

"The GPS is extorting money off me. It won't give me directions until I put money in its account."

That GPS was a real bargain!

St Peter at gates of Heaven tells thuggish looking man: 'You're in the wrong place, alright. Let me guess: sat nav?'

Fake Out! You are 300 miles from Dulles Airport! Hahah!

conclusive proof that the Moon landings WERE faked...

"Recalculating."

First Cynic in Space

Sat Nav: G Spot?

"I thought it was an error. THE GPS said 'time to destination 23 months'."

Lorry driver goes through woman's living room: 'Sorry for the intrusion, love ... blame the sat nav.'

Sat Nav Directions.

'Hello, and welcome to Acme Cable. If you're calling about a billing issue, big whoop. Get over it and pay the bill. If your cable is out, who cares. When it's fixed, you'll know it. If you're...'

Never get lost again! Introducing the Track Mapper - a navigation device for directionally challenged runners.

"At the next intersection, turn whichever way you f#$%!^&* want! You never listen to me anyway!"

Keep honking. Honk and accelerate. In 30 feet, cut that @#$% off. Really lay on the horn this time. Cabby GPS.

"You are either here or here."

You Are Now Officially In The Middle Of Nowhere: "Signal, is lost."

'Hope this thing's right.'

"Damned Sat Nav!"

"Atheist are hard to recruit! They hate foxholes!"

"Recalculating."

"He misspoke, I misheard, then shots rang out."