Sarcastic Commentators Gifts

Well done, Jim. If only I could sleep at home like I do through your presentations!'

'We've restructured our banking charges.'

'Well, he always wanted a permanent position.'

'Give me a break, will you? I didn't ask to go home sick, did I?'

"You don't tip them you bribe them!"

The First Fire Stick

Armstrong, the only doctor covered in the new health plan you got me is a veterinarian! Beats no coverage. Yeah, if you're a parakeet. You're so cheap. You don't value me at all. You ingrate. I didn't have to give you health benefits. Lots of employers don't cover their animals. You mean workers. Stop your barking.

Exciting potato bugs.

The transparent safe box of Panama

Redhead

"Because you've been working so little, you can have the rest of your career here off."

"White Collar Prison"

'I had to stamp down on staff using nicknames at work. They even had one for me!'

"I'm not worried about identity theft. Who'd want to be me?"

'Don't give up hope, Senator- We've worked out a plan to decrease your name recognition.'

"True, it is 'organic.' It's also a dead squirrel!"

'Never roll your eyes while the boss is talking.'

'It looks like blood, tastes like Ribena, I just hope it gets me drunk,'

'He lost his whistle,'

That's nothing. You should see what he writes in the comments section.

"Let's demonstrate our corporate values of diversity and inclusion and listen to some of Brian's stupid ideas."

"No, I don't wanna read your damn blog."

"Hey, Gary. Lois wanted to know if you’re up for waiting forever for reheated leftovers and sipping warm mimosas intended to ease the pain of poor service amid a cacophony of idiot tourists and 20-year-olds... you know, brunch."

"... and God bless my mom and her courage to call this food."

They stole your identity, but after seeing your credit score, they gave it back.

"I'm not sure what to watch...'Enterprise' or 'Sabado Gigante.'"

"Calm down, I'm just using the rules of modern competition."

"I want you to drink more beer, eat more fatty foods and take less exercise."

"Hey, if we're getting laid off, it's every man for himself!"

"Mine has a terrible battery life."

"You think you have the boss from hell?!"

'Oh he's sporty all right - he can be up and down on his stairlift in under ten minutes'

"The end of my patience is near!"

'I'm always broke because I keep getting MUGGED!'

"I see that there's an excellent sale on diddly-squat at the Zilchtown Mall in Nowheresville, New Jersey."