Sanitize Savvy Gifts

Things I didn't know about before 2020.

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

'In a nutshell, foods are drugged and drugs are eaten like food.'

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

Noise Pollution

Stop smoking,instantly.

Portrait artist drawing DNA patterns.

'You can't beat the old style security systems!'

Facebook/Meta

"Batteries for environmentally friendly electric cars. . ."

'We in the intelligence community have got to start ta.........I've already said too much.'

'This is the only secure line in the building.'

Rubbing alcoholics anonymous.

Hazmat suit

Harvest Data Festival

Password must contain at least one hieroglyph.

'Take more vitamins... Well maybe you shouldn't take so many vitamins.'

'That's where he goes to regain his sanity.'

'Nice try, Mom! They're pinking shears.'

'I'm getting really tired of your friend crashing here every night!'

"I would like some facebook friends for Christmas."

Fluff It Up. A hairdresser creates an amazing Afro.

The usual? My daughter's all over me about dyeing my hair. I want to go totally natural! Fine. Which would you like? Natural ash, honest honey or real platinum blonde? Which does Mother Nature use?

"It's an eject seat for burglars. I got the idea from the eject key on my keyboard."

Didn't that use to be Hogan's scrap yard?

"The gods didn't want my life, just my identity."

"Tablets? Are we talking digital or paper?"

hand sanitizer and hand santa-tizer

"Medicine is giving the eat-drink-and-be-merry model another look."

'Yep, this model was recalled. But you're the first customer to bring back a used one.'

"Who sanitizes the Sanitizer?"

Selling Home Security Systems.

'Just a trim or the usual three bags full?'

'Morning, ma'am. I'm here to install your security system.'

"What have you been up to lately?"